What I am about to inform you might save the life of your child. In today’s world the security and well-being of your teen depends upon his awareness and understanding of sex.
It is critical that you, as a responsible and caring parent address that problem in detail. Here are some essential questions to broach the subject, to let your child know you care and desire the best for him.
Recognize he may hesitate to speak about something so personal with you if you are not accustomed to sharing feelings and intimate subjects. You may feel ashamed raising the subject.
Prior to you do, make certain you can answer these questions on your own. Also, choose what you are comfortable sharing about your personal experiences and beliefs on the subject of teen sexuality and activity.
* To start, simply ask your teenager, “What kind of questions do you have or what do you would like to know more about regarding sex?” You will definitely get his attention.
* You may wish to throw away some details he is not likely to know, something like, “Do you know that the sex partners you choose can influence your vulnerability to certain types of cancer?”
The object here is to get your child talking-or a minimum of happy to talk. He might inform you he knows whatever he needs to know. Where do you go from there?
* Ask, “Do you understand that sex is not the exact same thing as love?” Watch his face for difference, acknowledgement, or confusion. Follow up with, “Sex is physical while love is psychological”.
Pay attention to what he says and to the words he does not speak. Notice his body language, hear the underlying message, the words between the lines, his tone, word choice and pace.
If you do observe that he is uneasy, tell him you observed and ask if he wants to speak about what is troubling him. Assure him that you are not here to evaluate him.
Most important, let him know you are having this talk due to the fact that you love him and no matter what he has actually done or is thinking of doing, he is safe talking with you. Tell him nothing can alter your love for him.
And after that go where he takes you. Let him be silent if he selects to be silent. It is okay to have silence. You do not need to speak. He might be processing.
Provide him the time and area he needs to do what he needs to do. He understands you are readily available when he wants to talk.
Truths are crucial. If he has unanswered questions, where can he choose accurate details? The streets, his friends, and the media might not be the very best place to discover what he seeks on the subject of sex.
* Make sure you ask your kid, “Do you understand that defense is not a 100% warranty of health, safety or an outright deterrent to pregnancy?” Make certain he understands the effects of the actions he might or might not take.
* Follow-up with, “Do you desire aid or advice in acquiring protection?” That concern is particularly important for girls who may wish to see a gynecologist and might not know how to find a good one who can look after her requirements.
Know that more than 61,000 searches were done in the month of April on phrases dealing with teen porn if your teenager uses the Internet. What pages is your child going to? Ask. If you impose your will he will go somewhere else to pursue his desires, Know that. Construct trust with your teenager.
The function in having this talk is education. I do not, in any shape, form, or method, supporter teenager sex.
When hormones and peer pressure start, a sensible and informed youngster, who has actually formerly pondered and made decisions about his actions, has a better opportunity of living the life he wants than one who has not prepared himself for the unavoidable emotions and situations that will come up in life.
Results and actions, preferable and unfavorable, show self esteem. To change habits, treat the cause not simply the signs.
What is the cost, to you and to him, of not knowing where your teenager stands on sex?